Sigh....

Sigh...

The day is finally over and i'm beat!!!! Today wasn't it at all! Well, in all fairness the day started out like any other day. I really didn't want to get out of bed but had to; left the house later than usual and thankfully there was no traffic. Made it to work in good time then it all changed.

Ngozi was scratched!!!! I couldn't believe it!!! Darn keke maruwa riders!!! There it was as clear as day, two lines all the way from the beginning to the end of the passenger's side of my brand new baby. Boy was I mad!!! What can I do? y dad will have a fit upon his return (by the way I'm certainly not a minor). Unfortnately, the rascals who caused me this much pain were long gone, sigh... I had to swallow my pain.

That was only the beginning oh!!!

Issues, issues and more issues!!! Now i sit in retrospect, I didn't achieve anything I set out to do today. People issues, unnecessary delays, client issues, procedural issues. I got yelled at several times and thrown out of an office. Had to tell a few white lies. The sun's gone to bed and I'm still here, arrhhh...!!! I'm just so frustrated.

If i was an alcoholic, it would have been Jack D n I all night. Maybe I can drown myself in Hollandia yogurt instead, who knows that could be a better substitute!!

There are just some good days and bad ones, sane and crazy days. What remains constant is how we handle these days and the challenges that are thrown our way to ensure the outcome stays the same. This is one of life's lessons I'm still learning to adopt.

All i can do is blog away daily, writing useless words unto the pages in cyberspace where no one goes and no one reads. This i find is comforting as each stroke on the keyboard eases away the pain within until I am LIBERATED!!!

Struggle....

I struggle daily with everything.

Living is a struggle.

Waking up is a struggle.

Dressing up is a struggle.

Eating is a struggle.

Poo-ing is a struggle.

Working is a struggle.

Finding love is a struggle.

Worshipping is a struggle.

Praying is a struggle.

Fasting is a struggle.

Keeping relationships is a struggle.

Being happy is a struggle.

Being sad is a struggle.

Thinking is a struggle.

Keeping fit a struggle.

Earning money is a struggle.

Saving money is a struggle.

Running a home is a struggle.

Finding a mate is a struggle.

Keeping that mate is a struggle.

Raising kids is a struggle.

Going to school is a struggle.

Staying focused is a struggle.

Falling asleep is a struggle.

Dying is .........?

Untitled

Life......

I think alot about life, mine, others, what is, what isn't, what could be and what couldn't etc

I lie awake with thots slipping through my mind like a slithering snake.

They envelope my very being while driving alone to work and back, to church and back or any destination that i fancy.

I ask myself, "am I a prisioner of my mind?" "is my soul trapped with with no escape?".

At times i wish i could runaway from me, from all these thots plaguing me, from my mind, from the whole world. To find a safe haven where I am free from all the demons tormenting me day and night, while I'm awake, while i'm asleep. These shadows that haunt me from afar and near, above and beneath.

How I long to run reckless and wild without these restraining chains bearing me down, threatening to draw me down to the abyss of nothingness.

Can i escape? Will i escape? Who can hear my silent screams? Is there no deliverer for my tortured soul??

Alas! I see.... What could that be? Who cometh from the distance?

A bright light floods my vision. A thunderous wind takes a hold of me. The earth vibrates as its core is shaken. Flashes all around. Hail storm seizes the land. Every living thing runs for cover. Fear grips my very soul. My heart pounds all around until my chest cavity is filled and is about to explode. A thick darkness shrouds me for the earth is at its darkest.

Suddenly.......... it is calm

Then a small still voice says to me "Be still my child for I will deliver you"

Hope like a pinpoint of light fills me from within as it gradually expands and takes hold of my every being. The chains around me fade to ash as I am released from all that bind me.

I look around, the darkness fades to nothing. The grass is green, the trees are in bloom and the birds sing a new song. I see my reflection in a still lake and I am clothed in the finest of garments with a glow from within.

A bubbly laugh escapes from my lips for once again.......... I AM FREE!!!

Thursday

It's Thursday and the day is almost over.
It's Thursday and the week is almost over.
It's Thursday and the hard work is almost over.
It's Thursday and the weekend is almost here.

The Meaning??

Life......... Death........

Living....... Dying........

Joy.......... Sadness......

Ying......... Yang.........

Good......... Bad..........

Action....... Consequences!

The list is endless. It all comes back to Life & Death. What's the meaning of it all? We live life struggling, when in the end it doesn't even matter. All the things we pursue, clothes, jewelry, jobs, cars, houses, fat bank accounts, marriages, bigger houses, babies, more babies, divorce, deception, LIES, envy, strife, child support, legal battles......

We go through the motions daily, such a sad routine being stuck in a loop. Doing things we really don't want to do; putting up a smile while we are dying inside. Suffocating under the crushing weight of it all. Screaming siliently while trapped in a maze of certian destruction.

I can't think anymore, I can't write anymore....... it all ends now!

Welcome

Hello everyone and welcome to my blog page - ECHOES!!!!!

I actually had a lot of ideas and thots running through my mind all week about what to and what not to add to this page but unfortunately everything's gone out the window now, sigh. Nevertheless, i'll try.

I must confess that i have NEVER EVER blogged b4 in my life!!! I never saw a reason to until last week. A good friend of mine (let's call her Zee) got her own blog page, so i thot to myself "why not get one too". So, here we are.

Now let the blogging begin....... giggle.....